The other day I was in a cafe and there was a young mother at the next table.  She screwed up her nose a bit and said to her son, about 11 years old, “have you had a shower today?”  He was quick to say yes, but I quickly glanced at his mother and she was looking doubtful.  One of the boys I used to hang out with when I was little told me once that all he had to do was wash his knees and his mum would think he’d had a wash.  There are always tricks people try, to avoid getting in that god-damned shower.

One of the first things a sex worker normally asks of her client is “would you like to take a shower?”  Many people say, “Oh, I’ve just had one”.  I usually inwardly smile when it takes me back to my youth and the boy who was the knee-washer.  Some are reluctant to have a shower but do so anyway.  Once back in the room however, we can tell if a man is really clean or has only washed his knees, as it were.

I can understand that reluctance.  Not everyone has their own private shower, and some don’t have that much room in the shower, either.  Is the water flow decent and does it feel clean, or will they leave the shower feeling dirtier than before?

The only time when you should feel dirtier when you leave the shower, is when you have this kind of shower:  I once did a double with a woman, who was a queen at incorporating a sexy wash time into her session.  I came up the stairs and into our room to join in and she was already in the shower with our client.  It sure did look hot.  She was bending over and he was behind her reaching down and fondling her.  Then she stood up, raised her arms to lean on the top of the shower door with her hands, turned her head so they could kiss while he continued to soap her torso.  It was very exciting being a voyeur, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be she or he at that moment.  They both looked like they were having a very dirty time indeed.  Water was splashing all over her face, ruining her make up, but by the end of our time with this lovely man, both of us had less than our original make-up left on our faces anyway, a small sacrifice to make for the filthy fun that was had.

The Japanese do metaphors especially well, I remember going to karaoke bars and noticing that the romantic parts of the videos were getting too steamy, they’d be cut rather skillfully to lots of watery shots – water being an erotic symbol: juiciness and purity all at once.  I was in Japan a couple of times last century, and at one place I rented in the heart of Tokyo, we didn’t have a shower, so we had to go to the public bathhouses.  We kneeled in front of little showers and soaped ourselves up, rinsed ourselves off and then soaked in a very hot bath.  The soaping up was quite a ritual.  While I was lathering myself up, I used to like to hold eye contact with the man who sat on a very high chair on top of the wall that divided the men from the women.  I wonder if he’s ever had such a bolshy redhead in front of him since?

What could be nicer than a warm up together and a good old sudsy splash under the water? There is nothing like sharing a humble shower – quite a fine way to begin some dirty fun.  (I also like to shower together afterwards if possible, just to make sure I’m sending a man home spic and span.)

The assisted washing thing is practically Biblical, even the Pope humbly likes to wash the feet of his devotees, although obviously not in the same way as the washing that goes on at Soaplands, (which is a concept like many other kinky treats, devised by the naughty Japanese I believe to by-pass their anti-prostitution laws), or in the showers of saucy working girls.  It’s kind of nice to give a dude such godly treatment as part of the divine act of sex work, or should that be sex play.