Tag: society
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Evolution of an escort
Click here for enlarged image of The Garden of Earthly Delights by Hieronymus Bosch. *Image information at the end of this post. I have been interviewed about being an escort a couple of times in Australia many years ago and not so long ago in New Zealand. I personally love to hear stories of how things…
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Sex work after lockdown
You can’t please all of the people all of the time. You’ll need to login to enjoy this anonymous phone message It seems not long ago that Covid-19 broke out and we were forced into lockdown, and now we are nearly into level 2. According to the government business website, in level 2, non-medical massage…
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Not About The Heart Of Darkness; Whoring As A Profession At The End Of Capitalism*
This is a guest post by Christchurch escort Clio** the Whore. ‘You live in a fantasy’, says my client wistfully. He is lying on my bed in a state of post coital triste, having expounded to me his marital problems. He looks around him, at the beautiful room bathed in golden light with its fin…
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What a Way to Make a Living
Hylas and the Nymphs is a 1896 oil painting by John William Waterhouse. So I’m well and truly back into sex work, although with later hours than I have ever worked due to other things I am doing in my life – so I am truly a “lady of the night”. This has brought with…
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Sex Workers Starting With Why
Roy Lichenstein We Rose Up Slowly (1964) Why do sex workers do what they do? I’ve been enjoying the fabulous book Start With Why by Simon Sinek after a recommendation by someone I respect a lot and who has had an amazing career in their (creative) field. In fact I listened to the audio…
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Ways to do sex work – part two (touring)
Beautiful Kaikoura on the east coast of the South Island, view from the beach during a brief train stop Touring sex workers are a not-so-modern phenomenon but since the Prostitution Reform Act (2003) in New Zealand we are able to tour and sell our services in a much more organised manner. I personally love to…
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Ways to do sex work – part one (cam work)
My occasional series about selling sex originally coincided (until my blog was rearranged) with the impending release of a film about cam models (ladies who interact with paying and non-paying internet customers via web cams). It is kind of like live porn, being largely user-directed and featuring a solitary actor (it is quite complicated to…
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Equal and Unequal Measures
by Clio the Whore A Tourist’s Guide to the BDSM World Status is a funny thing and not always what you think it is. Service to others comes in surprising forms. What looks like sheer selfishness can in fact be a pure act of love. Where there is pain, there can be pleasure, in equal…
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Is your New Year’s resolution to have more sex?
Image: Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise in Eyes Wide Shut In 1999, Stanley Kubrick released his last film, Eyes Wide Shut, which starred Kidman and Cruise, ‘a Hollywood couple whose marriage was in trouble, about a New York couple whose marriage was in trouble.’ It was famous for an orgy scene, but in the subtext of the…
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Must we mature sex workers still lie about our age?
A guest contributor on my blog last year wrote in favour of mature ladies, acknowledging the benefits of more experience and knowledge of the wonders of a woman’s sexuality. While agreeing with this, as an “enlightened” (or I could say mature) woman who now feels okay about being real about my age – and a…
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Some men (who love their wives) visit escorts
Sometimes couples stay together because they really love each other and want to continue the personal investment they’ve made in their past and the family unit and home. The monogamous ideas that have been passed down through the ages means that couple are obliged to only make love with each other until the end of…
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Outsourcing of sex relations to a sex worker
Photo: Ever since I was a young girl, I have had a thing for lace. I love reading blogs about sex work and Maggie McNeill’s blog, the Honest Courtesan, is surely one of the best. One of my favourite posts is this one, A Whore in the Bedroom, which she wrote for ladies. It got…
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What’s a nice girl like me doing in a job like this?
So people sometimes ask me, “what’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?” Well – First of all, the place I work is really rather nice and I can honestly say, I am in the best working situation I have ever had. I set my own hours, my own rates, and…
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Men love to look
How to hold the attention of men* There comes an interesting time in the lives of young women when we realise the effect that our body has on men. It could be when out of the corner of our eye, we see that male head is turned as we totter across the road in our…
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To Network or Not to Network
It can be lonely being a sex worker yet I’ve met a few ladies who prefer to stay away from any socialising online or in real life and keep to themselves. They don’t want any dramas despite the benefits that can be had from meeting and greeting with other working girls or clients. I can…
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What to do if you bump into your sex worker in public
Image: Bob Hoskins and Cathy Tyson from the film, Mona Lisa (1986) We all need to get out and about in the world to buy stuff and whatever, and sometimes we are with our families, work colleagues, friends or partners when a sex worker bumps into one of her clients. So what is the correct…
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Don’t give me culture!
I share my favourites from the world of culture: film, music and the arts on my “keeper” list. These ones are all erotic and/or sex work related. My favourite typecast actress would have to be Anita Morris, who normally plays the horny redhead. You will recognise her from the She Was Hot (Rolling Stones) video;…
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Desire: The Secret
The Fisherman and the Syren by Frederic Leighton (1858) Sometimes when I start writing, if I have a theme or an idea I want to think about, I search online for the single word or phrase. I did this with desire only to discover that there are many self-help books out there around spirituality, in particular…
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Fantasies about men
Still from music video: It’s Raining Men, by the Weather Girls When I’m not doing sex work full-time, I actually miss fucking, and as a result of this, my imagination works overtime. I occasionally work in an office, answering the phone: “Good morning, (Company Name). (My real name) speaking” and generally being a real little…
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Valentine’s day topic: Sex workers and the L word
A mention of Amber O’Hara from a brief round up of websites of sex workers by a kind client I have met sex workers who have fallen in love with their clients and “ended up” together, so I guess the answer to the question, Do sex workers and clients fall in love? is yes. Love can…
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I can’t make you love me
It is probably safe to assume that most of society, even those who pride themselves on thinking progressively, in their heart of hearts, looks down on sex workers, but are mostly too polite to say so to our faces. In the media, society’s attitude toward sex work is reflected often, even in the supposedly more…
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Lurking and Peering and the Culture of Complaint
The day I visited my friend and fellow sex worker, Clio, at her house*, I was wearing my (non-sex worker-like) day clothes of jeans and a plain, dark woollen top and carrying a large, black art portfolio, as I was visiting to show Clio some sketches from a creative project I started at university. As…
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What gets women off (part two)
Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there was a epidemic of sexual dissatisfaction called Hysteria. Women all over the place were getting it, the symptoms were vast and doctors were treating it by massaging the clitorises of their patients. This method of treatment would result in what was then known as a paroxysm,…
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What gets women off (part one)
It’s been widely concluded that it’s harder for women to get aroused than men, and that it takes longer. That some women lose interest in sex. That some women have a lower libido overall than most men. The thing is with (straight) men, a glimpse of bosom or derrière seems to be able to do…
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So, you are the black sheep of the family…
Christmas is the time of year when we are confronted by where we came from – most of us, while not necessarily being physically present with our family members, at least make contact with them – and the realities of who they are (and maybe what they have always been like) becomes glaringly apparent. Families…
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The pleasures of non-sex work
I often write about how much I love sex work, and one of the reasons I love it as a lifestyle is because it gives me so much time to get involved with various projects as non-Amber. Since I began sex working again, I learned a lot about publishing on Amazon kindle by guinea-pigging myself…
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My experiences with celebrities (as a hooker)
Disclaimer: I have never seen Charlie Sheen as a working girl Some celebrities, like Charlie Sheen, are well-known for having enjoyed the services of sex workers, and others have managed to keep it on the down low. It’s not as if Mr Sheen outed himself, but he doesn’t seem overly bothered that it is out…
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Fond Farewells
This is a final blog post, by my friend, Clio the ex-whore, recently retired. Retirement only sort of suits me. Only a couple of weeks ago an ex colleague and I were reminiscing over a few cocktails. We don’t miss it, we said, isn’t great to have a straight job and be proper respectable women…
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Sex workers and websites: if you build it will they come?
Although many sex workers are still getting websites built for them or DIYing it with free sites like WIX or blogs, I have heard some saying they don’t know what to do with them (“now what?”) or how to get clients (“traffic”) to go to them. So I’ve been picking the brains of one or…
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Can his family affect a man’s confidence in bed?
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny de Vito, two quite sexy dudes, played test-tube brothers in the film Twins* My usual Christmas blog posts have something related to families since this is the season to be with our kin or if not, due to distance or some other factor, at least give our thoughts to them for…