Tag: life
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Flirting and Squirting
My Nanna when she was alive was an incorrigible flirt. Even as she was dying in hospital, she was batting her eyelashes at and flirting with the male nurses, who were generous enough to humour her and play along. She used to say that every man deserves to be flirted with, that it’s good for…
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Desire: The Secret
The Fisherman and the Syren by Frederic Leighton (1858) Sometimes when I start writing, if I have a theme or an idea I want to think about, I search online for the single word or phrase. I did this with desire only to discover that there are many self-help books out there around spirituality, in particular…
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Fantasies about men
Still from music video: It’s Raining Men, by the Weather Girls When I’m not doing sex work full-time, I actually miss fucking, and as a result of this, my imagination works overtime. I occasionally work in an office, answering the phone: “Good morning, (Company Name). (My real name) speaking” and generally being a real little…
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Valentine’s day topic: Sex workers and the L word
A mention of Amber O’Hara from a brief round up of websites of sex workers by a kind client I have met sex workers who have fallen in love with their clients and “ended up” together, so I guess the answer to the question, Do sex workers and clients fall in love? is yes. Love can…
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I can’t make you love me
It is probably safe to assume that most of society, even those who pride themselves on thinking progressively, in their heart of hearts, looks down on sex workers, but are mostly too polite to say so to our faces. In the media, society’s attitude toward sex work is reflected often, even in the supposedly more…
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Lurking and Peering and the Culture of Complaint
The day I visited my friend and fellow sex worker, Clio, at her house*, I was wearing my (non-sex worker-like) day clothes of jeans and a plain, dark woollen top and carrying a large, black art portfolio, as I was visiting to show Clio some sketches from a creative project I started at university. As…
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What gets women off (part two)
Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there was a epidemic of sexual dissatisfaction called Hysteria. Women all over the place were getting it, the symptoms were vast and doctors were treating it by massaging the clitorises of their patients. This method of treatment would result in what was then known as a paroxysm,…
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Buying Sex – creative licence and a Canadian doco
This blog post may not be of interest to many readers because it is about a film that not many will get to see and it is not really a film that’s even worth seeking out. But it’s about buying sex, which involves clients of sex workers so I thought I would give my take…
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So, you are the black sheep of the family…
Christmas is the time of year when we are confronted by where we came from – most of us, while not necessarily being physically present with our family members, at least make contact with them – and the realities of who they are (and maybe what they have always been like) becomes glaringly apparent. Families…
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Me as Mrs Jones, a MILF
MILF, Ms O’Hara, has a thing going on with a number of young and young-at-heart men My non-Amber, slightly frumpy, mother-next-door self lives a double life as an insatiable MILF and this little secret injects a huge amount of spice into my life. As Amber, I am ready in my boudoir wearing tiny corsets, stockings and…
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The pleasures of non-sex work
I often write about how much I love sex work, and one of the reasons I love it as a lifestyle is because it gives me so much time to get involved with various projects as non-Amber. Since I began sex working again, I learned a lot about publishing on Amazon kindle by guinea-pigging myself…
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My experiences with celebrities (as a hooker)
Disclaimer: I have never seen Charlie Sheen as a working girl Some celebrities, like Charlie Sheen, are well-known for having enjoyed the services of sex workers, and others have managed to keep it on the down low. It’s not as if Mr Sheen outed himself, but he doesn’t seem overly bothered that it is out…
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Sex work is hot!
Image: Flight of the Conchords still from the video Sugalumps That lady with the chopsticks at the beginning of the video. I get like that. So, sex work can be pretty darn hot. Sometimes I feel like a slutty 16 year old all over again. (Other days not so much.) But it is so much…
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Fond Farewells
This is a final blog post, by my friend, Clio the ex-whore, recently retired. Retirement only sort of suits me. Only a couple of weeks ago an ex colleague and I were reminiscing over a few cocktails. We don’t miss it, we said, isn’t great to have a straight job and be proper respectable women…
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The joy of (phone) sex
Among the men I am fortunate to sexually liaise with are interesting, intelligent, creative types. One of my clients who I regularly enjoy phone sex with is in this category and he thanked me by sending me his account of a recent session. I find it very erotic. He has given me permission to share it. …
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Can his family affect a man’s confidence in bed?
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny de Vito, two quite sexy dudes, played test-tube brothers in the film Twins* My usual Christmas blog posts have something related to families since this is the season to be with our kin or if not, due to distance or some other factor, at least give our thoughts to them for…
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Forced conversations when you’ve been outed
Cyber bullying comes in many forms, from the relatively mild (but still harmful) tweet-bombing, Facebook posting, harassment on online forums etc, to the most dreaded extreme for sex workers – being publicly outed and/or lied about as a sex worker on websites set up to humiliate. When this happens, and sex workers have to deal with…
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Sex Workers’ Supporters: Please take a bow
Sex work: sometimes it really is fields of daisies and buttercups. Painting by John William Waterhouse. Frequently during discussions about sex work, the subject is raised of bitches and bitchiness among sex workers. Perhaps images of girls pillow fighting while wearing skimpy underwear is tantilising, and often there are suggested scenarios of “professional jealousy” causing…
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A taboo subject: sex workers from the same family
1978 movie Pretty Baby publicity still* As Christmas is for family get-togethers, I occasionally ponder at this time of year, the place of sex workers within, or their relationships with, their families. Lately I have been talking with a few sex workers who have other family members also in the industry. Even though there are…
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Selling sex
It seems that a few sex workers I have spoken to get a bit funny about the bit where clients hand over the money, and I can’t for the life of me see why. To me, it is one of the most exciting parts and it is what differentiates us sex workers from the…
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Sex work, mental health and sex addiction
From the show The Daring Young Man on the Flying Trapeze by Max Gimblett I found it interesting when a sex worker I am acquainted with wrote that her father, on finding out she was a sex worker, enquired as to how she was going to safe guard her soul. He could just as easily have…
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What it’s like to be the only one
Stephanie Hunter – Australian Escort I’ve been in touch with a few escorts from Australia as well as one or two kiwi escorts now working over the ditch. It seems that even though our laws are similar, that is, that penetrative oral sex must also be covered, in recent times, in Australia sex workers have…
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Pleasure
Poor is the man* Whose pleasures depend On the permission of another From Justify My Love by Madonna © 2006 WMG Pleasure, according to a book I have been reading about women and aging, is something women deny themselves far more than is good for us. Apparently there is something that is released in our…
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Does the G-Spot exist?
Meg Ryan from When Harry Met Sally This is just a short post because occasionally I hear people saying the g-spot is a load of old cobblers. That may or may not be true as far as any anatomical identification goes in medical school. Rumour has it that it is the secret internal spot on the…
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Sublime Pleasure – how long is a piece of string?
Amore e Psiche by François-Édouard Picot (Painted 1817, Paris)* “How many times did you come?” is a question that many men wonder or even ask ladies after they have ascertained that their partner did actually orgasm while they had sex. However, orgasm for women is often not that cut and dried. I’ve been curious about…
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Orgasms – the great anti-aging secret?
Image: Jane Fonda – still hot in her advancing years – although she admits she has had plastic surgery, she is open about a happy sex life and her appreciation of porn. Could this be the real reason she still has a rather sexy twinkle in her eye? I’ve lost count of the number of…
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Love Within Sex Work
I found this tweet the other day and it really resonated with me. It’s because I feel exactly the same about my clients. I really love those dudes! A lot of the time I give my heart and soul to my clients, and get it back in spades. Which got me thinking. Is this professional,…
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Talk dirty to me
You may have noticed that I offer a new service now, namely phone sex. I’ve always been the girl who loves sex and especially loves to talk about sex, I guess that’s why I have this blog: so that those who want to listen (read) can. But there is something even more wanton when you…
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High-class tarts versus low-down whores
Portrait of a Courtesan (c. 1520) by Palma Vecchio I always find it interesting to hear opinions on the classes of sex workers and who fits where. As I mentioned in my post about ship girls, we ship girls were considered pretty darn low-class for having sex with sailors, yet I found that the clients were…
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OUT!
The Scream by Edvard Munch One thing sex workers seem to fear most is being outed, or an aspect of their lives being outed, and interestingly it is probably the most well-used threat some sex workers make against others. However, quite often sex workers let things slip, for example by their lifestyles or in conversations…